


You're Okay Sometimes

by glaciesdraco



Category: Undertale
Genre: Brotherly Bonding, Colorful Language, Comfort, Ehhhh, Fluff and Angst, Gen, I wrote a kid fic so now I wanted to write one where they're adults, More Fluff, Self-Loathing, Underfell, Unnecessary Cursing Probably
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-23
Updated: 2017-05-23
Packaged: 2018-10-27 11:36:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10808253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glaciesdraco/pseuds/glaciesdraco
Summary: Sans comes in looking distressed and expects his brother not to comment or feel worried in any way.





	You're Okay Sometimes

**Author's Note:**

> Just another thing I wrote. I write a lot of these. In the end I don't think I really got across what I meant to... oh well.

"Sans, are you okay?"

 

It was the first thing Papyrus had said in almost half an hour, and Sans shot him the most impatient and incredulous glare imaginable. As if he'd asked something out of line. Papyrus could have strangled the life out of him. He just comes through the front door (an uncommon occurrence indeed) and just sort of, falls over on the carpet before Papyrus can even look up from his junior jumble. Papyrus had carried him into his room and sat with him as he shook and shuddered uncontrollably. Papyrus had stayed quiet the entire time, waiting for the attack that was ailing his brother to subside before Papyrus had felt obligated to ask. It wasn't his fault Sans was so secretive and cagey all the time.

 

"Yep, I'm good bro." Sans voice was soft and strained, like he didn't want to be using it and Papyrus could now tell why. There were faint streaks along his cheekbones from where he'd obviously been crying. Papyrus hoped that none of the neighbors had seen him, though knowing Sans they probably hadn't. Seeing the tears made Papyrus finally realize that his brother might be going through something a little larger than a panic attack.

"Perhaps... something happened? You were attacked, or harassed in some wa..."

"No Paps, no one's touched me I'm just LIKE this, ugh. Why do you always got do that!" Sans probably meant to sound angry, but his voice trembled on a low and soft note.

"Do WHAT?" Papyrus sighed, quickly losing his patience.

"Assume I can't take care of myself and just let things happen to me, like, like you need to protect me all the time!"

"I didn't say you needed protection, you impossible little...!"

"You don't have to. I can hear it in your s-stupid voice..." Sans scowled at him, and shuddered, turning away from him. Papyrus' rage evaporated temporarily.

 

"Why can't you just... accept that there's somethin' wrong with me?"

Papyrus paused, and though Sans wasn't looking made an unconscious attempt to avoid looking at his face.

"...if you're referring to your HP..."

"I'm NOT. It's not always about my stupid HP, Pap, I just... there's just SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME. Something more..."

He started shaking, and apparently continued to cry while Papyrus gazed unhappily at him. He didn't know what his brother was talking about, but was afraid that saying so would only make matters worse. He wasn't very good at comforting others when he actually knew what was bothering them, and with Sans it was whole separate ordeal. He didn't ever understand how Sans could feel so many complex things; maybe it was because Sans was smarter than him, or maybe his brother had been taking their family's share of the emotional burdens for so long that Papyrus just didn't know what it was like. He decided to reply to Sans with a safe answer.

"There is nothing wrong with you, Brother..."

" _Whatever_ Paps, you don't even know what I mean."

"Well you acted as though I did, and it were obvious!" Papyrus snapped finally.

Sans curled even further into himself, not speaking. His breaths came out low and hollow, trying not to make a lot of noise but not completely unnoticeable. Papyrus sighed,

"We'll talk about this later. You should rest..."

Sans was quiet as Papyrus walked toward the door, but quickly added a "Thanks Boss" under his breath that Papyrus had to strain to hear.

"There's nothing wrong with you." Papyrus repeated firmly, turning his back to him. He shut the door, and left him alone for a while.

 

~

 

Some time passed before Papyrus went to check on Sans. He knew his brother needed lots of space between stressful situations. Walking out the door, sitting at his post, eating breakfast... the usual sort of thing, but Papyrus couldn't help but go as soon as it seemed appropriate. His brother was still shaking after half an hour, but at least he's managed to fall asleep. He approached his brother's sleeping figure in the dark of his room and sat at the edge of the bed to study him. He put a hand on Sans' scrunched up skull.

It seemed as days went by faster, the stress stacked up higher on the skeleton brothers. They'd never fought each other this much on a regular basis before, which was saying something. Sans seemed more upset about that fact than anything, which Papyrus couldn't begin to understand. After all, it was still over the same old things, habits, occurrences; it had just been a little bit more frequently than they were used to is all. Besides, most of their encounters could easily be avoided if Sans didn't have to act so offended and childish at every question Papyrus asked. Could he really blame Papyrus for worrying about his own brother? Sans, an odd character indeed for someone so anxious, could get himself into some highly risky situations, like going to Grillby's ten times a day to sit at the bar with the drunk members of the Royal Guard.

That wasn't the only thing pushing the rift in between them either, and though Papyrus hadn't realized what Sans had been talking about before, he knew now only too well. Recently there had been a large rise of... well, violence among the members of the Guard. Rumors had been going about that since the Underground's need for stronger members kept increasing, the only way to ensure that worthy monsters were moving up the ranks were by fighting to the death. Of course, this was just a theoretical military practice and not an official one, Papyrus had heard many rumors about such members of the guard doing just that.

Sans had been, understandably, Papyrus mused begrudgingly, upset about this rumor. He didn't like entertaining the idea that his brother would be at risk merely because he was a more ambitious and stronger built member of the sentries, and also known for his dismal kill count of zero. He didn't want Papyrus with the job anymore at all. He didn't even seem to see the point of Papyrus following his dream.

"You know they're gonna expect you to kill, right? Like, not just kill humans, but monsters too? Do you have any idea what they'll turn you into? Paps, that isn't you!"

"What do you know about the Royal Guard? You don't know what I'll have to do! I won't have to kill anything if I don't want with my skills and magical ability!"

"Papyrus, this isn't about any stupid qualifications you think you have, the fact is, the guard, and all it stands for, is just a huge load of crap and it doesn't matter what you want to think is the truth, because it's true! I don't say anything about your training with Undyne, and your cooking lessons even though they're half-baked, but this shit is serious. They might kill you, and for what? You don't belong with them."

 _"I'm_ going to change the way the guard is run. I'm going to, and I'm not gonna fight any other monster to do it, and I won't let anyone hurt me on my way up there. You know I'd never kill anyone just for a job, Sans. It'll be fine. Don't you trust me?" Papyrus allowed himself to be vulnerable for just a second only to be burned by his brother's scathing glare.

"Of _course_ I trust you, you egotistical jerk! But you're not listening to me! They aren't interested in you changing things with your high and mighty ideas! They'll come after you, because you're a threat, and there's nothing you're gonna be able to do to change that!"

"I'm _going_ to be in the guard. That's final. You can't stop me, and neither can anyone else. You'll see!"

Sans had then derailed completely, calling his brother selfish and self-serving and acting like he was serving the lot of monsterkind when in reality he was just feeding into it. Sans had apologized afterward, but the words still stuck. Emotionally heated that he was, Papyrus had clapped back that perhaps that Sans was being the self-serving one. After all, being a sentry alone had already done enough to put Sans in harm's way, opening the possibilities to Sans being kidnapped or hurt in order to blackmail Papyrus or weaken him. Sans had immediately shot back that if Papyrus was so worried about 'his property' getting in his way then maybe he should do him in himself. ('I'll save ya your first kill bro, come on, just say the word, and I'm _there.'_ ). Papyrus had been completely at a loss at this point. That was when Sans had finally shut down and looked more upset then Papyrus had yet to see. Most of their fights ended this way, and in retrospect, Papyrus could see that they were leaving a heavier scar on Sans out of the two of them.

 

Papyrus had learned Sans' true sense of self-preservation soon enough, or lack thereof one, that morning. They'd been strolling past the librarby, having a normal conversation for once, when a monster had shot a bullet pattern at Papyrus with his back turned. Papyrus, ever prepared, had a bone club at the ready to deflect an attack, but Sans had jumped in between them in a split-second before they even past through the air. Sans deflected what had been a measly attempt at a lethal attack with a bone pattern twice as complex and three times more lethal, scattering the bullets in an instant and then going straight for the monster. Sans turned his soul blue and then slammed him into the library wall, holding the monster within an inch of his life before walking toward him. When he was close enough, he whispered something illegible for anyone else to hear before throwing the monster face first into the snow and bellowing so everyone could hear,

"Here are the rules, kids! Don't fuck with my brother in the middle of town, and ESPECIALLY don't when it's this goddamn early. Jesus H. Christ, you'd think these people were raised in a lab or something, well, let me tell you, I was and even I know better than to be so fucking rude as to interrupt someone's _conversation_ , what the hell is wrong with all of you..."

Sans had pattered along as if nothing were out of the ordinary then, and Papyrus had followed suit, but he couldn't help but wonder why the tension in his brother's shoulders had never ceased after that. He'd expected an 'I told you so' at least once today, but apparently Sans was in no mood. Then he had disappeared, and Papyrus had figured that maybe his brother was just having a rough spell after their encounter due to his nervous disposition. He didn't think there was anything particularly odd or wrong with Sans for it.

Only now did it occur to him that Sans had genuinely been scared, not only by the situation, but how he had in fact been correct. Papyrus rubbed his brother's back with attempted gentleness.

"..I'm sorry I'm such a bad companion to you..."

"...what?" Papyrus' reaction was delayed.

"I can't... protect you like I want to... I'm not strong enough, and I'm not... I mean, this morning I couldn't... I couldn't bring myself to..."

Papyrus tilted his head, "That monster was no threat to us, Sans."

"Y-Yeah, but! He wanted you dead, and this was probably just the beginning!"

"So? We'll handle it. We always have."

"N-No. I... I can't. I can't do this, I just can't..."

Papyrus felt a pang of sympathy. He knew how his brother felt; sometimes life in the underground grew too... perverse. Too transparent, and wicked, and it seemed like things could only get worse. The difference was that Sans' soul made him despair over it where Papyrus let it make him stronger.

"Sure you can." Papyrus said measly.

"I can't. There's something wrong with me."

"There's nothing wrong with you."

"Then what would you call it?" Sans asked him, voice flat but his fruitless desperation was palpable. Papyrus took a moment to think about it for him. He leaned on him slightly, putting a little pressure between his shoulder blades.

"There's nothing wrong with you and who you are," Papyrus said simply, "There's something wrong with the underground. That's why I want to fix it. I'm going to fix it. And you're going to help me."

Sans groaned, but Papyrus continued.

"This place. Our home is... so misguided. Everyone has to put up an act down here just to impress each other and for what? We're all scared... we're all just trying to survive. Some of them are confused, and think that killing and getting stronger are the only way to survive, but we know the truth brother. We've gone our whole lives, both of us, without killing anything."

 

Sans was quiet for the longest time, so Papyrus had thought he'd fallen asleep again. He sat there with him, and rubbed his back, reviewing what he had said and wondering if he'd said anything that wasn't right or if he should add more. Finally, Sans turned over and smiled at him.

"You're so great, Boss. Who the hell taught you to be so great?"

Papyrus snorted, "You did, sorta. Don't go thinking you can take all the credit though..."

"Heh, of course not... nothing good could come directly off of me..."

"I wouldn't say that... exactly... I mean you did at least teach me most of the things I know."

"You're so good, Pap. Without even trying to be, like... that was such a great thing to say..."

"Well then you must be a pretty good monster too. Considering, erm... I only could have gotten the idea from one place..."

 

Papyrus laid on Sans' mattress with him and pep talked his brother up a little more, leaning his head on his brother's chest to feel closer to him. Sans was completely silent, staring off into space and not answering him. His brother was stoic, unresponsive, his only sign of life being that he'd placed a hand around Papyrus' shoulders to rub at his brother's temple. They fell asleep like that.

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I want to thank everyone who was so supportive of my last brotherly fic. Honestly I can't tell if I'm doing a damn thing right with my writing, but it feels good to have everybody enjoying the stories I have in mind at least, if not because the writing is good. So thank you! <3


End file.
